It's beneath us." Then what would you be into?" the green fellow asked nonchalantly, plainlyunaware of the danger."Try mayhem," the white man said, and his facial features morphed into agrotesquely distorted version of themselves, with a thick ridge runningacross his brow, his eyes glowing yellow and two huge canine teethprotruding from his mouth. The black man underwent a similar transformationand then, before I could even contemplate stepping in to help the man inthe green suit, they both let out a growl and lunged at their haplessvictim.The dapperling swung his stick. In less than one second his would-beassailants were immobilized with frozen looks of rage on their faces, onlyto collapse and disappear in puffs of fine dust that signaled the end oftwo vampires and also of my theory that I was not in the Buffyverse afterall. Totally unfazed, the man wiped some dirt off his shoulder, let out anairy "Hmm, too bad," and walked off in the direction he had been facingduring the abortive. Lucindaand Ms. Carlton just smiled, knowing that they had already pushed mefurther than I wanted. "I think that before he is fitted for his dress, we need to get him aproper pair of high heels so we can see how the hem of the skirt falls."And before I knew it Terri was dragging me over to the shoe departmentwhich was adjacent to the lingerie section. I sat down, my legs encased in the black pantyhose when a man, about 30came over and asked if he could help. Before I could say anything Ms.Carlton spurted out, "Randy here is a member of the Harrison orchestraand he needs to be fitted for his first pair of pumps, something black,basic, and with a three inch heel."I was absolutely mortified as she describes my predicament. The clerk,his name tag said is name was Bob, was very professional and kept astraight face as he measured my foot and said he would be right back.I sat there dumbfounded, almost ready to cry but Ms. Carlton, Lucinda,and Terri were talking away until Bob returned with.
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